College, Mental Illness, OCD, Tourette Syndrome

What Kept Me Going at My Worst

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I grew up a Roman Catholic and the morals and values that faith gave me helped make me who I am today. When someone faces a struggle so big, you can’t help but search for reasons as to why this has happened. For my family, our answer was always “God has a plan.” I truly believe that. God has a plan and everything happens for a reason were the sayings that got me through my hardest times.  I’ve known what God’s plan was since I was 13 years old. I met Dr. Franklin and Dr. Antinoro at UPENN Center for the Treatment and Study of Anxiety and they introduced me to the lifesaving methods of treating my OCD. I knew after meeting them that they are exactly who I want to be when I grow up. This right here was God’s plan for me. I am struggling now, but one day I can use my experience to help others like myself. I’ve always been the kind of person who wants to please others. I don’t want to offend anyone, I don’t want to upset anyone. I want everyone to be happy, healthy, and in love with life’s adventures. Dr. Franklin and Dr. Antinoro brought back the happiness and hope in my life. That is what I want to do for others.

So, as I had tread my way through the rough seas, this dream of mine, this plan, kept me going. I knew one day I would get better. My parents made sure of that. I would not always live like this. Hope was something I almost always had. Life can’t be this hard forever, right? Right. One day the stormy clouds have to pass. One day the seas have to calm. One day the winds die down. Everything will work out in the end. Everything I’ve gone through will be a life lesson and will make me stronger. These thoughts were essential to getting me through the worst of times. I hope by writing this, someone may read this and become inspired to start thinking this way. Optimism is the only way you’ll get through it all in the end. Why not start now?

 

~ Stay Chipper ~


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College, Mental Illness, OCD, Tourette Syndrome

Speaking on a Panel!

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Tomorrow is a big day! I will be speaking on a panel for the Greater New York State Tourette Syndrome Conference for Educators Day. Although I am no longer a Teen, I will be speaking on a panel for teens with Tourette’s. I have always been outspoken about my illnesses and have wanted to take it the next step further by making a difference. I’m hoping this is the first of many panels to speak on. School would have been impossible if not for the amazing support my school district gave me. They were so willing to learn about my illness and accommodate to my needs. Every teacher, nurse, and principle in my school went above and beyond to help me, so now, I’m able to share my experience with educators who are willing to listen. Maybe my experience will help the students in which these educators will be assisting. I’m excited! As for an update, I’m in my final year of undergrad. Can you believe that? Two years ago I couldn’t see myself here. I was immobile and trapped in my house. Even last year, I didn’t allow myself to get my hopes up on returning to school. OCD is very present in my day to day life, but I’m making my way through. I shower once every five days, which is not ideal. Weekends are unproductive thanks to my avoidance issues, but my new plan with my therapist is to make myself go to the Library on weekends. We’ll see how it goes. I’ve had a few all nighters because of avoidance with writing papers. I realize that if I can’t stop this avoidance of papers on the weekends, then I would not have a change in Graduate School. That’s my current long term goal. Go to Grad School. During the week the Library is where you can find me. I get my work done and honestly, I enjoy my library time. I listen to my study music which consists of the one and only Josh Groban and I easily get my assignments done. It blows my mind how far I’ve come. Barely any OCD with school during the week. It’s truly a miracle. I’m only taking four classes this semester, but in the spring I will be taking five in order to graduate on time. I’m nervous about that. That also means that I have no choice but to pass my hardest class this semester…Experimental Statistics. *cue dramatic music* I have a tutor and I meet with my professor, so we’ll see how it goes. All-in-all, I’m very optimistic about how life is going right now. I see a bright future ahead of me. Life is not an easy road, but with a chipper attitude, you’ll get through it one way or another. Even if that means recalculating and taking a different route.

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~ Stay Chipper ~


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